Alex Scott wept Monday morning as she remembered her difficult childhood, growing up in a violent and abusive home.
The former Lioness, 37, admitted that discussing her traumatic past in interviews to promote her memoir How (Not) to Be Strong was the ‘hardest part.
Despite writing about her distressing formative years in the book, she claimed to not have spoken it out loud – and began bawling when Phillip Schofield read a segment.
Crying: Alex Scott broke down in tears as she recalled her troubled childhood growing up with an abusive and violent father on Monday’s This Morning
Beautiful moment: Alex was given a hug by Holly Willoughby after she burst into tears.
It was written by her: ‘When dad was sober, he could be charming. However, once alcohol was added to the mix that would all change. My mum, brother and I never spoke about it.
Alex was asked by the ex-children’s host if she found it difficult to write.
While mumbling, she said: “The hard part is that I didn’t write this chapter to shame dad. It was my wish for mum to be liberated.
Strong: She claimed that she did not speak out about the difficult times in her formative years, despite writing it down in the book. Phillip Schofield then read an excerpt and began laughing.
Role model: The former Lioness, 37, admitted that discussing her traumatic past in interviews to promote her memoir How (Not) to Be Strong was the ‘hardest part
I want her to see that she is role-model and be able to take the next step. In the book, she thinks that she is a coward. “She’s nothing but.
Alex confessed recently that her father used to beat her when Alex was 7 years old. One incident that was so brutal that Alex believed that her mother had been killed, she said.
Alex had to be controlled so much by her father that Alex could not show any affection towards her siblings. Alex also admitted that it was traumatizing to still hug Ronnie and Carol her parents.
Opening up: She had written: ‘When my dad was sober he was a charming guy, but the moment drink was involved that would change. My mum, brother and I never spoke about it.
Candid: She stated that she didn’t have to write the chapter in order to shame her dad. She said: ‘I wanted my mom to be free.
Speaking to Steven Bartlett on The Diary of a CEO podcast, Alex admitted they would ‘live in fear’ of upsetting their father Tony and having to deal with the consequences.
Alex recalls the night Carol declined to buy Tony a beer at her sixth birthday celebration.
Alex admitted that ‘as soon as everyone leaves that night, he doesn’t forget…that was the hardest one that one…My mum is trying desperately to survive and i’m in a small room just listening and hoping that she’s still alive.
“We lived in fear”: Alex, who was speaking with Steven Bartlett about his podcast, recently wept when she recalled the moment her father killed her mother.
“I heard all.” She tried to run, and I could hear her. My mum is my only desire. We weren’t permitted to express our love.
“That’s control. “If we did not speak up or obeyed orders, it would mean that something could happen to us or our brother.
She spoke about the impact on long-term relationships, saying that she can no longer hug her mum. It was a difficult environment. I don’t believe I ever hugged my brother.
Alex recalls: “What my mom would experience, terror and helplessness, that you can’t do any, you’re living in fear.” (Photo taken in 2013).
Alex said that her child-coping methods were the same as those of her parents. The environment was controlled and it made me feel at ease.
“I loved my father so much that I became his little girl. But he also had a dark side, and we all saw it a lot growing up.
“Drink” helped the situation out more. You could even see his turn. That’s how my mom took it out on us all, especially me.
It was something I sensed as a child, it’s the place we are in. If you move out of line, you already know what is going to happen.
Childhood: Alex was banned from showing any kind of affection, admitting that to this day the trauma has stopped her from being able to hug her mother Carol or brother Ronnie
“What would my mother go through? The terror and helplessness of not being able to do anything. You’re living in fear.
Alex answered the question “I fear being home” by saying that she had ever been afraid of going home.
‘It’s easy not to talk about it, every single day you see your mum walking on eggshells, she’s scared to have a voice, say something, because she knows what she’s going to go through.’
Alex shared that her dad forced her to make a choice between her mother and her brother when she separated from her parents.
She confessed: ‘I feel sad thinking about him, even to this day… then my dad just goes, leaves with everything, furniture, everything.
“I was so fortunate to have football. That gave me something I could focus on and structure.
“My mom puts a lot on her own shoulders.” As I attended therapy, I felt guilt and was able to talk. However, it brought my mom back to the place she had hurt.
Alex confessed: ‘I wanted to love my dad so much, I was daddy’s little girl, but he had this dark side and that’s a side we saw a lot of growing up’
After bottling up her feelings for so long Alex used the tools she learned in therapy to help her move forward and heal from her experience and gave her the strength to recount the abuse in her autobiography, How (Not) To Be Strong.
Her explanation was: “I have kept it hidden up to now, but I am older and wiser so I no longer feel the burden of it.” In the hopes that my mother will be freed, I wrote this book so she could move on.
“She enjoyed it. She didn’t realize that I had gone through so much. She didn’t need to be worried about me. She has learned so much about me and my emotions.
She didn’t realize that she didn’t understand that when I was a kid, I didn’t go to bed because I was trying to hear if she’d wake up the next morning.
“I had shut myself off from my life and was unable to deal with emotions. I didn’t want anyone helping me. I was doing everything for everybody around me, but I needed to be able to help myself.
Healing: After bottling up her feelings for so long Alex used the tools she learned in therapy to help her move forward and heal from her experience
Alex continued to say that she hadn’t seen her father for five years, after attending her grandmother’s funeral.
She remembered: “He had some alcohol and stated that he knew he wasn’t the person he ought to be. He also admitted that he has many regrets.
“I didn’t care” was what I thought. My whole life was spent sending him gifts and cards. I felt guilty that he would be alone, so I rang him to let him know I loved him.
“I didn’t hear about him…it’s all talk.” “I’m done with it.”
Throwback: Alex had her last interaction with her father when she competed on Strictly Come Dancing in 2019. She made it to Blackpool.
Two years after her first contact with her father, she revealed her story. She was performing on Strictly Come Dancing in Blackpool and had reached the finals.
Alex was shocked when she received a text from Tony out of the blue asking if he could get her tickets to the show for a couple of his friends.
She remembered: “He didn’t really care about me, or how I was doing.” He only cared about his friends’ Strictly tickets.
I had to have the guts to say “that’s wrong”, and it was something that touched me in a way I hadn’t before.
‘Straight away he text back apologising and I thought “this is bulls**t” and I haven’t spoken to him since.’
Alex said, “On the one hand, I have done this book for my mom to get her freedom. On the other hand, I am scared that it might ruin my father’s life. And I don’t want that.” (pictured in 2019).
She said that she had plans to talk to him prior to her autobiography’s release, noting “I need to” and “I want to”.
She stated, “One hand I wrote this book to save my mother; on the other I was afraid that it might ruin my dad’s and my life. I don’t want that.”
“I must find the courage to say to him that I have written material that isn’t going to make him feel comfortable. He’s not the person I want to be. It’s not easy for people to change…he doesn’t know much about me.
Plans: Alex said that she had plans to talk to her father prior to the publication of her autobiography. She stated, “I need to and I want too.”
Alex’s candid chat comes after Alex revealed the reason she chose to detail her past relationship with her teammate Kelly Smith in her new memoir.
Kelly, 43, and the footballer played together for Arsenal and England, and their relationship was confirmed earlier this week.
Alex spoke on Wednesday on The One Show, explaining that “parts” of her relationship had affected her entire life and that she needed to end the cycle.
Jermaine and Alex Jones joined her in explaining that they are super private. She also said, “I will always be very open about my relationships.”
‘The sole reason that I wrote the chapter is because I was writing this book. I felt as though I was cheating not just myself, but everybody else too.
“It was an integral part of my life. I fell deeply in love with it, that feeling we all wish for and was fortunate to experience that.
Alex has a candid chat after Alex shared the reasons she decided to write about her relationship with Kelly Smith, her former teammate in her memoir
She said, “There are some parts that have continued in that relationship, but part that I have taken into other matters, which I need to change.” The cycle had to be broken.
“There were certain aspects of this relationship that influenced me all my life.”
The footballer openly admits that Kelly was her first love, while she speaks of their ‘heartbreak’ after they separated.
Alex opens up about her past in the book How (Not to) To Be Strong. She also mentions that she would not be happy if they didn’t share their experiences as they worked together to face their own demons.
Alex was also told by people close to her that she’s had relationships with men and women, but doesn’t consider herself to be anything.
Speaking to The Mirror at the launch, she explained: ‘I’m writing this book and I want to tell everything. It would be cheating to you all, I thought.
“It was like my first love story. It’s where I found myself madly in love. There’s heartbreak and all that, but that’s part of my daily life that I won’t change.
“Because it’s a feeling of love, that excitement, and the joy it brings you, it had to be there.”
Alex shared how Kelly assisted her in dealing with her trauma childhood, while fighting alcoholism.
Alex was told by a source that Alex dates men and women, and does not consider herself to be anything.
“This isn’t her major coming out story, but it was an important chapter of her life she wanted to write about because it had such an effect on her.
Ex-fiancée: Kelly, 43, played for Arsenal and England for many years. This week, Kelly confirmed the once-rumoured romance.
Following their split, Kelly went on to marry DeAnna Dobosz in 2016, with whom she has two children.
Alex largely remained tight-lipped about her relationships in the past, though she was rumoured to be in relationship with Coronation Street’s Sam Robertson in 2020.
The interview was conducted by The Sun’s Fabulous magazine in March 2021.
She stated that Sam was her only date. [Robertson]You are so lovely.
“The photos were published in newspapers the next day because someone had snapped a picture at the restaurant. It wasn’t exactly a great start!’
Alex, in an interview with The Times recently suggested she might be single and said that she would ‘let down her walls’ to find love.
Refuge is available for help at no cost on 0808 2000 247 if anyone you know has been subject to domestic abuse.
Upset: She candidly stated that she was her first love as she spoke about the heartbreak that ensued (pictured 2017).