Rehman Chushiti (Tory MP for Missing Person) went AWOL for a few weeks during a critical vote in the Commons.

And what was so important to defy a three-line whip to scupper Labour MP Barry Gardiner’s Bill to end fire and rehire? 

Answer: The Saudis arranged a jolly trip to Lisbon, which was followed by a vacation in Portugal. 

On October 21st, the King Abdullah International Centre for Interreligious and Intercultural Dialogue ended (KAICIID), a day ahead of the crucial Commons vote. 

But ‘Shifty’ Chishti extended his trip by three days and even posted pictures of himself doing a Hasselhoff on a beach.

The former vice-chairman of the Tory Party did not, it appears, get permission from the Whips’ Office to skip the vote. 

Missing person champion and Tory MP Rehman Chishti (pictured) went AWOL for a few days during a recent crucial vote in the Commons, I can reveal

Rehman Chishti, Tory MP and Missing Person Champion (pictured), went AWOL during a crucial vote in Parliament.

A source tells me he ‘would have been b******ed’ on his return to his Kent constituency of Gillingham and Rainham.

I can further reveal that it’s not just a £1,000-plus freebie for flight, meals and accommodation that Shifty’s work for KAICIID involved. 

He’s also been using his Commons office to appear in its events. Last December, the MP took part in an online webinar – despite strict rules that offices are to be used for parliamentary business only.

Earlier this year, Parliament’s sleaze watchdog found Shifty guilty of breaking the MPs Code of Conduct after lobbying for a planning application to build homes made by one of the MP’s donors.

The Pakistan-born 43-year-old, whose father was an adviser on religious affairs to Prime Minister Zulfikar Ali Bhutto, appears to have embraced the country’s affinity with Saudi Arabia. 

Shifty’s previous work outside of Parliament included advising the King Faisal Centre for Research and Islamic Studies for £2,000 a month.

KAICIID this year moved its headquarters from Vienna to Lisbon after Austrian politicians found the guts so lacking here to speak out about Saudi Arabia’s human rights record following journalist Jamal Khashoggi’s murder.

Shifty declined to answer questions regarding his work in the Kingdom and his opinions on the Kingdom’s human rights record.

Shifty Chishti might also be a chair of the All-Party Parliamentary Group for Missing Children and Adults.

Aitken moves into jail 

Jonathan Aitken is embracing his reincarnation from jailbird to doing God’s work. At The Mail on Sunday’s Features party last week he gave his address in the Guests Book as ‘HMP Pentonville’. 

The former Cabinet Minister was jailed in 1999 because of perjury. No, he’s the chaplain at the prison, whose alumni include Oscar Wilde, George Michael and Spectator columnist Taki. 

Peter Cruddas, a Barrow boy who became a billionaire after Boris Johnson’s controversial admission to the House of Lords, has displayed his usual dosh splosh.

The appointment was wholly unrelated to the £3 million Cruddas donated to the Tories, which he rightly recognises would, if true, amount to ‘corruption’.

The Lord of Spread Betting gave five friends in ermine tickets to the Conservative Winter Ball, Victoria and Albert Museum last month.

Barrow boy-turned billionaire Peter Cruddas (pictured) has shown his customary dosh splosh after Boris Johnson controversially got him into the House of Lords

Peter Cruddas, a Barrow boy who became a billionaire after Boris Johnson controversially enrolled him in the House of Lords

Four of them are hereditary peers – Viscount Younger, Lord Harlech, the Earl of Courtown and Lord Ashton.

Also invited to the £1,000-per-ticket ball was Baroness (Olivia) Broomfield, who David Cameron ennobled for services to Tory coffers from her old role in CCHQ.

Cruddas Cruddas, founder of CMC Markets, is getting to know how the club functions. Broomfield happens to be both a Tory whip as well as a Baroness in Waiting for the Royal Household.

Sir Keir Starmer has increased his Arsenal attendance.

Despite having a season ticket for a standard seat at the Emirates Stadium, earlier this month he took a £2,160 freebie from the Premier League to sit with three guests in a box and watch the Gunners narrowly beat Watford, followed by a ‘free’ lunch. Red card.