Just Like That…

Sky Comedy, Thursday

Rating:

And Just Like That, after 17 years, they’re back. Partly. 

Carrie, Miranda and Charlotte are both back. Charlotte is also back. Samantha is not back. Kim Cattrall would prefer to be dead. She had other obligations. It was probably a good idea for her to stay clear of other commitments, if at all.

Sex and The City is a strange reboot.

At no point does Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker, above, centre, with Cynthia Nixon, left, and Kristin Davis, right) turn up wearing a corsage the size of a dinner plate, which is a pity

Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker above, center, with Cynthia Nixon, below, and Kristin Davies, right,) does not show up in a corsage that is the same size as a dinner plate.

At times, my entire body was in complete embarrassment. Stop it. Run. We’ll pretend it never happened!)

However, episode 1 ends with a terrible event that brings some emotional weight. This raised my rating from two stars to three. You are completely swept under the carpet by it, and I must give it credit.

The three of them arrive at a trendy restaurant for brunch. Was brunch possible before Sex And The City was created?

It is a great look, but it’s much less dramatic. Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker), however, does not appear in a tutu nor do they wear a corsage that is larger than a dinner plate.

The show wants you to notice that they’ve noticed that they are in their mid-50s now. ‘I’m 55,’ announces Miranda (Cynthia Nixon). ‘I’m 55,’ Charlotte (Kristin Davis) will later say. 

I don’t know what they expected us to expect. That they’d be crocked? That they’d be shuffling around in Manolo Crocs while saying: ‘I’ll put the kettle on. Anyone want something while I’m up?’ It keeps pointing out things about itself, is what I’m saying.

The questions we all want answered are addressed in the first few minutes (so I don’t consider them spoilers). 

Are Carrie and Big still together? Yes. Are Miranda and Steve still together? Yes. Is Miranda now having to pick up used condoms from Brady’s bedroom floor? Ugh, yes. Are Charlotte and Harry still together? Yes. 

Is this as bad as the puns? Surprisingly this is actually bad pun lite. Do we still have Carrie’s ‘What I began to wonder…’ voiceover? No.

Meanwhile, they explain Samantha’s absence thus: she’s working in London and has ghosted Carrie and the others ever since Carrie decided she didn’t want a book publicist any more. 

While this may be one approach to dealing with Cattrall’s death (who would rather die), it is unlikely Samantha would do the same. You would think they have to speak up.

The original series, which ran from 1998 to 2004, was important not because it was feminist – it wasn’t; they were all fixated on riding off into the sunset with a Mr Right – but because it sold the male characters deliciously short (unheard of) and was direct about desire and sex from a woman’s point of view (also unheard of).

I remember once turning it on when my mother was visiting – it was the episode when Samantha found a grey hair down there and brought out the dye; it was that episode – and quickly turning over to Bergerac. John Nettles is always safe.

There have been 2 movies that were not watchable in the interim. (Actually, the first wasn’t that bad. I blanked the second. Is there a camel in the second?

As he was annoying on the scale, I also have blanked out that Russian artist Carrie was seeing during one series. I now realize that it was a show you can love but hate everyone on it.

Now, back to the restart. 

Miranda is now doing a masters in human rights, Carrie has a podcast, because everyone has to do that– ‘it’s like jury service’, she says; there are still some good lines – and Charlotte has two daughters who, 17 years later, manage to be about 12.

For most of the first episode – there will be ten and I watched two – they were all still so girly, which is what made my cheeks clench. ‘You can’t just sit there and giggle,’ Carrie’s podcast co-host tells her, and I felt much the same. 

Miranda meets her professor the first time she sees him. Miranda then makes a huge mistake, and is so neurotic confused that it’s hard to believe. 

Big and Carrie, meanwhile, act like newlyweds even though we all know that, 17 years on, it’s about who takes the rubbish out. The relationship between them does not appear to have grown. 

Although it is obvious in some places, this felt more like an acknowledgement of the original series than something that would naturally be present.

There are now non-white substantial characters, which was necessary, but its references to how the world has changed also didn’t feel organic. 

The exchanges were educative. Most importantly, however, they often seemed forced.

But, that tonal swerve mentioned above is what changes everything. You’ll sit up then, right enough, and will probably want to watch episode two, although after that, possibly not.

Meanwhile, if you’re in it for the affluent lifestyle, you won’t be disappointed. Carrie lives in two Manhattan apartments, and has a beach house. Carrie has an enormous walk-in wardrobe that is filled with shoes and racks after rack! (‘Hello, my lovers,’ she says to them.)

It’s like The Beatles with Ringo but it doesn’t have Cattrall. She would be happier to die… It was simply too busy.