One LinkedIn posting by a self-described “full-time father” has split opinion. It discussed how he must use the facilities that are geared towards mothers, as there is no alternative for dads.
Project manager Matt Nixon, of Worthing, West Sussex took to LinkedIn to explain that as a ‘full-time worker and full-time dad’ he often has to go to ‘mum’ and baby classes and use nappy changing facilities in women’s bathrooms.
Parents commended him for supporting involved fathers and have liked the post more than 1,500 times.
But others suggested he should “get over himself” and that men do the same thing every day for decades.
Matt Nixon (pictured), a Worthing-based dad, went viral after sharing an emotionful post about becoming a father.
Matt explained that he is a father, full-time worker, and dad. He attends baby and mom sessions and changes his nappies in public.
Matt shared childcare responsibilities alongside Harri. He wrote, “I don’t do daddy daycare.” I am not “hands-on dad.” I’m not a “hands-on dad”.
“I’m a dad who steps up to be the modern father I want. I am a full-time father and worker. After leaving finding very few ‘dads’, I am the one who shows up to “mum” sessions and baby sessions.
‘I’m the one changing nappies in the ladies toilets… cos [sic]Evidently, no one puts them in the guys!
‘I’m the one who’s “weird” for speaking openly about my kids and wanting to promote a positive narrative around family life…
‘My boys inspire me each and every day… #dadgoals #mentalhealth #dadlife’
Matt stated that he is open about his desire to create a positive family narrative and is inspired every day by the stories of his children. Matt with Harri
Matt was praised by many fathers who were in similar situations. He wrote: “I 100% agree with all you have to say.” My twins have found it very unpleasant to be taken to “baby” and “toddler” groups. While I was happy to do it for them I rarely felt like I was being welcomed. I was even patronized at times.
Another added, “It is a shame you even have to shout about being involved father in 2021.” This should not be a rare thing. You are all to be commended.
Another said, “I totally despite [the term] Daddy daycare.” It is not true that I’m a good boy for taking care of my child while mum’s day off. I’m a parent.’
There were some criticisms, however. Another person commented, “Don’t most fathers do that or are you still living in 1930?”
Many people responded to Matt’s posting claiming that they have been successfully balancing their career and parenthood for many years
Another said, “I did all this and more 25-years ago…get over yourself.”
One third said, “You can’t be both a parent and a dad full time.” You will need to make a choice at times and the answer may differ from one to the next.
“The notion that you can have all of it is what brought us to this point.
People who do not have children (or aren’t responsible for their kids) will likely progress quicker, be paired more and have greater opportunities. This should affect men as well as women, if the playing field is too even.
Matt’s sharing of his experiences was appreciated by many who also admitted that they relate to certain assumptions about fathers.