Operation Red Meat. It sounds just like one of the clandestine missions which changed World War II’s course.

Perhaps Boris Johnson has been inspired by the new movie, Operation Mincemeat, which tells the true story of how British spies deceived Hitler into believing what we would today dismiss as ‘fake news’.

The Royal Marines landed on the coast from Spain a corpse disguised as an officer during the spring 1943. 

It was seen carrying a briefcase that contained papers, which suggests the Allies may be about to invade Greece or Sardinia rather than their intended target of Sicily.

Nazi sympathizers in Spain gave the documents to Germans. The Germans fell for the elaborate scam and diverted their forces away from Sicily towards the Greek islands.

This resulted in the liberation and success of Europe with far fewer casualties that was expected.

The plan would have failed and there would be bloodshed.

Boris Johnson, who has a number of poor goals and clumsy actions, is under attack today. His political future is hanging by a thread.

While he might have won crucial battles against Covid-19 doomsayers, it is very likely that he will lose the war.

Winston Churchill signed off on Operation Mincemeat personally, which he acknowledged was a risky undertaking. If Winston is going to be able to save his life, it will help him.

Operation Red Meat has become the new name for this fightback, which is a long-awaited blitz on Conservative policies and values.

My visions have Boris in siren outfit and homburg wandering the Cabinet War Rooms, smoking a Romeo y Julieta, while briefing his loyal associates (including Rishi Sunak). You might see it as follows: . .

Brois Johnson is planning an 'Operation Red Meat' policy blitz in a bid to win back his backbenches and dampen anger

Brois Johnson has plans to launch an ‘Operation Red Meat’ policy blitz, in an effort to win back his backbenches.

Pay attention, everyone. The Labour Party, BBC and even Fifth Columnists are all bombarding us.

Although I stated previously that I took more from alcohol than I received, I feel it is now time to join the party. All booze will be banned in Downing Street’s cloisters from now on.

Wine Time Fridays are over. No more trips to Tesco Metro at the Strand in search of Vino Collapso. Raab: I’d like you to take that refrigerator out of Green Park.

Clear thinking is essential for the existence of any existential conflict. We must therefore be brave and accept our responsibilities. Men will be forced to admit that this was their darkest hour if the administration continues for three more years.

You can no longer follow the science. They have been proven wrong. We have to take back the control. Omicron has about the same chance for death as Elvis on Mars or being decapitated with a Frisbee.

All restrictions are now lifted. There will be no more self-isolating masks in schools and there will also not be any vaccine passports. 

Starting Monday, working remotely will end. Without compensation, any civil servant who refuses to report to office will be dismissed.

All criminal convictions for violating the rules of government will be overturned as a gesture to goodwill and compensation for any breaches of lockdown. Fines will also be returned with interest. 

It is time to fight the true enemy. Nadine was already given instructions to stop paying the BBC licence fees for the next two-years and to abolish them altogether by 2027.

Mr Johnson pictured during Orime Minister's Questions in the House of Commons last week

Mr Johnson photographed during Orime minister’s questions in the House of Commons.

Who is running Broadcasting House these days — Lord Haw-Haw?

The head of the NHS has been informed that they will no longer receive any money until the bureaucracy is eliminated and the waste of billions every year.

The NHS is responsible for protecting the public and not vice-versa.

The UK Health Security Agency — formerly Public Health England — will be abolished. We can’t expect hard-working taxpayers indefinitely to subsidise public sector inefficiency, especially at a time when the country is facing a serious cost of living crisis.

Rishi will create an emergency budget to scrape the increase in Corporation Tax and National Insurance Contributions and eliminate VAT on Fuel.

It seems absurd to rely on import fuel when a country with vast oil and gas resources is rich. This all for the sake of a Net Zero.

Why should the Chinese be cutting their carbon emissions if they don’t want to?

All plans to shut down existing coal-fired or nuclear power stations are being halted. As soon as licenses are issued, North Sea oil- and gas extraction can resume at full capacity.

Drill, baby, drill!

It is over for motorists. Temporary cycle lanes, and low traffic neighbourhoods that were brought under the cover of Covid will all be removed. Smart motorways are being scrapped, and their hard shoulders will also be restored.

We have promised that we will regain control over our borders. Priti, the Navy has been asked to take control of the Channel shipping routes and stop illegal migrants crossing British territorial waters via dinghies. They will be brought back to France, regardless of French preference.

We will continue to honor our promise to increase the economy. The Govester will announce tomorrow that the entire country, north of the Trent, is being turned into one giant freeport — and to hell with Treasury opposition.

While we tried to work with the EU in good will on Northern Ireland, this has been futile. We will immediately invoke Article 16 unless Brussels does not back down. We didn’t vote for Brexit to allow a part of the United Kingdom not to be a satrapy under a foreign power.

BoJo was a little doomed after a near death experience. The ball was taken out of my eyes. For that I truly regret.

I have to take over the reins. Two Ronnies of Doom have been put to pasture. Yes, there have been many mistakes. However, I’ve learned that there is no need to fear disasters. There are only possibilities. There are always new disasters.

It would be a disaster if Captain Hindsight, a beer-swilling hypocrite, were to prosper in our present predicament.

If the Starmer Chameleon had been in charge these past two years, we’d have been in permanent lockdown.

I still believe that I’m the best man for the job, especially if the choice of successor is between Dishi Rishi and Fizzy Lizzie.

There are many mistakes made and these times can be difficult. The Great Man stated, “If you’re going through hell,” keep going.

We must not forget our Conservative values as we make the transition to Covid. It may not be enough, however. People are begging for red meat.

We need to make a fool of ourselves, Moggster. That will elevate the entire tone of government. Pop over to Westminster Bridge, jump in and don’t come back . . .