You are close to me
Rating: 
Worzel Gummidge: Guy Forks
Rating:
Lumme, us men are a useless bunch, aren’t we? Can’t cook, can’t clean, can’t be trusted . . . It’s enough to make you wonder why women bother with us at all.
After seeing Christopher Eccleston play the depraved, stupid Rob in Close To Me, (C4) I felt moved to apologize for all the other blokes.
Girls, we’re really sorry. Thank you for everything. Oh, blast it, my fault — I forgot, we’re not supposed to call you ‘girls’ now. I meant to say ‘ladies’. Oder is it worse? Sorry. Please ignore me.
Rob is one of the most hopeless characters. This six-part drama centers on Rob’s hopeless wife Jo (Connie Nielsen). He finds Jo at the bottom step of their designer house, drunkenly.
Lumme, us men are a useless bunch, aren’t we? Can’t cook, can’t clean, can’t be trusted . . . It’s enough to make you wonder why women bother with us at all
Jo is unconscious when he tries to transport her to the hospital.
Rob can she trust to fill in all the gaps? Obviously not — he’d struggle to fill in a colouring book.
Jo has to find out on her own that her dog is dead, she’s feuding with her best friend, her father has dementia and she appears to be having an affair with the sexy tattooed gardener . . . Rob might not notice them unless they actually were in bed together.
He hasn’t even bothered washing the blood off the stairs. He relied on his friends for food while she was hospitalized. It’s plain that, if Jo had died, Rob would have to remarry immediately. He couldn’t survive unaided.
Connie is a Hollywood actress best known for her blockbuster films Gladiator, Wonder Woman and other hits. She’s a convincing wife who has borne too much of the weight of marriage for too long.
That pressure has turned her into somebody she doesn’t much like. There’s a judgmental voice in her head that criticises everything she does. She used to cope until her memory was lost.
Now she doesn’t even know her own computer password.
She may have forgotten or blotted out some very serious warning signs. Her adored son Finn has not come to visit her since the accident — Jo thinks he’s at university, but that might be something else Rob hasn’t got round to mentioning.
I especially enjoyed the way Worzel dismissed a hole in the story, when the children (India Brown and Thierry Wickens) complained that they didn’t understand why the Guy was so keen to be burned
And someone has carved the words ‘Help Me’ into the back of her fitted wardrobe.
That looks scary, but my guess is that Rob did it: he wandered inside during an uncharacteristic attempt to hang up some clothes, and couldn’t find his way out.
Worzel Gummidge is the Bumbling Scarecrow. (BBC1) Worzel Gummidge relies upon his Lady Friends to help him get out of trouble. This includes Aunt Sally (Vicki Pepperdine).
As she sorted out some mischief with Guy Fawkes on Bonfire Night, she was hurling insults in all directions: ‘Frillypom nincomblouse! . . . Flouncing fluffadandy!’
Mackenzie Crook also wrote and stars as Worzel in the script. It is full of lively details like this. Toby Jones, who played six of the members of the village Bonfire Committee in a wide variety of facial hair styles, had a lot of fun.
I especially enjoyed the way Worzel dismissed a hole in the story, when the children (India Brown and Thierry Wickens) complained that they didn’t understand why the Guy was so keen to be burned.
‘That don’t matter, do it?’ shrugged Worzel. ‘Lots of things I don’t understand!’
Only Doctor Who would have the ability to be as witty and quick. Instead it became a tedious analysis on why the Crimean War time travellers went to a battleground during this week’s Crimean War. My concern grew less as Jodie Whittaker, Doctor, explained more.