After being upset by her coworkers’ behavior during her time away for mental illness, a woman asked if they should apologize to them.
Unnamed mum shared her experience with Mumsnet British Parenting Forum.
Her boss was upset she did not acknowledge “how much they did” for her while she was away and that they understood each other’s feelings.
“I don’t want to apologize for leaving them without work, but it is their responsibility to complete it as if it were mine. The woman said so.
Many people responded to her post with differing opinions. Some claimed that her coworkers behave like children bullies and she should talk to HR.
Other people, however, expressed sympathy with her and her colleagues. They suggested she should also show empathy for their experiences, especially since many were not able to travel while she was on work.
One woman asked her if it was wrong to not apologize for taking on work for colleagues while she was away for eight weeks due to mental illness (stock photo)
Mumsnet was contacted by the woman who explained that her colleagues’ attitudes left her in pain and she left her job early due to the hostile atmosphere at work and the lack of support her boss provided.
The woman explained that she had been suffering from anxiety and depression for the past eight weeks.
She began, “It was terrible even taking that first step back into the workplace and work was part of the reason I was so sick as well as personal problems (divorce and breakup of families and guilt over the loss of my daughter’s home,”
‘Some of the direct coworkers were judging me. It made the return to work so hostile and awful that I ended crying in a storage area on the first day. After this, I had to leave early because the atmosphere was too intense.
“My boss said to me that he spoke with a number of people today and they had strong feelings about me. They took over my work and I had to return. I walked in acting like nothing happened, and I didn’t even recognize “how much” they did for me while I was gone.
“I cannot tell you how shocked I am by this. Then he explained that he knew where they were coming.
Sustained commenters claimed her colleagues are bullying and “childish” and suggested they would show more support if she were suffering from a physical illness.
“I cannot get my head around that.” They have work assigned to me and I don’t want to be sorry. But surely, it is their responsibility to complete it as if it were mine.!
“The minute I signed off work, this work was no longer my issue. This is my boss’s problem, but they were doing me a favor and I should thank them.
‘I nearly had a f****** mental breakdown for two months and had some seriously horrible days and nights of no sleep, feeling like I had nothing left to live for. Now I feel terrible for not being able to go back to work. I’m also ungrateful to everyone who fulfilled their contractual obligations.
A follow-up blog post revealed that she had claimed only 15% of her work went to colleagues
“Officially they should not be blaming us, but I have to admit that if I found out that people were missing holiday because of my illness, then I would first acknowledge this upon my return.
Other claimed that she was not empathetic for failing to thank her coworkers, and that it was an inexplicable part of her job.
Although saying sorry may not be the right thing to do, it would be polite to show empathy and acknowledge their pain.
An additional commenter agreed with the sentiments. She said she was grateful to her colleagues for their support during three weeks of emergency surgery.
“Yes, it was their responsibility to do so. The manager had to do the same and then thank them. However, they were still colleagues. This is a simple way to express gratitude.
“Given you had to be away for your mental health, you would have been more aware of how much it affected them. They are human beings.
A Mumsnet friend shared their experience, saying they can relate after having to fork out extra to care for children and felt exhausted picking up the work of a colleague who was absent for six-months.
Other people, however insist the victim is being bullied. If it were a problem with her physical health, she will be treated differently.
You were away sick. What would they think if you had an accident, or been in hospital for several weeks before returning home to recuperate? They wouldn’t.
“They treat you horribly and your boss is disgraceful.”
One of her friends advised her to contact HR, stating that this was bullying. Your illness was for God’s sake. You don’t need to apologize and go back eating bags after eating. Your boss is a terrible one. It was not acceptable for people to cancel vacations. But this is his fault.
Other people claimed her boss was at fault and that he isn’t professional for using her to make scapegoats.